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Top 10 sommelier winespeak cartoons

A US-based sommelier has struck a blow for clarity by creating a series of witty cartoons to represent abstract wine descriptions.

Publishing her illustrations on Instagram, Maryse Chevriere has tapped into the absurdity of winespeak – exemplified in the now notorious description, used by Ian Cauble in the film documentary Somm, of a Clare Valley Riesling as smelling like “fresh cut garden hose”.

In tribute, Chevriere, who works as a sommelier at Petit Crenn restaurant in San Francisco, uses the Instagram handle @freshcutgardenhose.

Chevriere has kindly given the drinks business permission to publish her drawings and in the pages that follow you will find a selection of our favourites.

“Lightning strikes a rose garden, blasts rain-dampened earth in your face.” (Alessandro e Gian Natale Fantino Cascina Dardi Bussia Barolo Nebbiolo 2001)

“Old, but hanging.” (Château Lafitte-Laguens Bordeaux Supérieur 1979)

“Fresh pear, screaming acid.” (Thibaud Boudignon Les Fougerais Savennières Chenin Blanc 2013)

“What the air would taste like on a humid day if there was a florist next to a charcuterie.” (Domaine du Pegau Cuvée Reserve Châteauneuf-du-Pape 1998)

“Delicious. Blind, guessed N. Rhone, however. I was far from Beaujolais. Lovely fruit but pushy Brettanomyces. Strawberries should have been a clue.” (Château Thivin ‘Reverdon’ Brouilly 2013)

“The slickest pimp with a limp. #PassThePimpCup.” (Günther Steinmetz ‘Brauneberger Juffer’ Riesling Kabinett Feinherb 2013)

“Rescued from a sad wine shop where it had been sitting on the shelves since release. Little hope for resurrection at first but then a faint heart beat. And after that fruit and flowers and rocks.” (M Lapierre Morgon 2007)

“Man-eating shark with a laser on its head. But a friendly one.” (René Geoffroy Empreinte Brut 1er Cru 2007)

“Baked apricot wrapped in a wet wool sweater.” (Domaine du Clos Naudin Vouvray Moelleux 1989)

“Brutish and short.” (Pierre Matrot Meursault 2012)

3 responses to “Top 10 sommelier winespeak cartoons”

  1. Anne Krebiehl MW says:

    I think Ronald Searle had the idea first with his still unrivalled “The Illustrated Wine Speak” – one of the best wine books ever!

  2. This is an excellent description of a wine. It manages to be evocative of the wine, and expressed in a way that means you don’t need to be a trained wine ponce to understand it.
    It is a shame to take the piss out any attempt to raise wine description above the strictly ‘factual’
    Otherwise we are left with: “Medium plus acidity, medium tannins, low to medium fruit”……
    …….which tells us nothing.

  3. ….. to clarify – I meant the one about the florist and the charcuterie. Some of the others are a little less praiseworthy…..

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