Joker prints hilarious wine descriptions

When you’re looking for a wine that’s just right, sometimes the conventional wine descriptions – like “dry”, “sweet” or “fruity” – don’t help very much. These tasting notes, however, hit the nail on the head.

The brainchild of comedian Jeff Wysaski, “Obvious Plant” is a unique and hilarious subversion of the typical, everyday signage that we encounter in shops and public places.

His take on more “honest” wine descriptions is something that some wineries could learn from.

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“Jeff W. says: 5 stars! Gave this to my pet goat and he loved it!! Pairs nicely with: Pasture grass and repeatedly headbutting a wooden fence post”

“Jeff W. says: Guaranteed to get you ‘suburban mom drunk’. Pairs nicely with: Nabisco 100-calorie packs, episodes of Desperate Housewives and embarrassing your daughter in front of her friends.”

“Jeff W. says: Bought this for some underage teens in the parking lot and they seemed to like it. Pairs nicely with: making an easy $10”

“Jeff W. says: Not sure about the taste, but the broken bottle works great as a weapon for keeping deadly Night Orcs from stealing your gold. Pairs nicely with: Orc flesh and dungeon quests”

“Jeff W. says: Chardonnay? More like ChardonYAYYY I’m drunk at work AND IT FEELS GREAT anyone wanna wrestle? NO SARAH I WILL NOT STEP INTO YOUR OFFICE. Pairs nicely with: Unemployment”